


Baby, It's Cold Outside (We're Androids, Who Cares)

by beeayy



Category: Detroit: Become Human (Video Game)
Genre: Cuddling & Snuggling, Established Relationship, F/M, Huddling For Warmth, Post-Pacifist Best Ending (Detroit: Become Human), Sharing a Bed, Vacation, Vacation subterfuge
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-21
Updated: 2020-12-21
Packaged: 2021-03-11 02:22:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,720
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28217652
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/beeayy/pseuds/beeayy
Summary: Markus is too warm. North is too cold.for the #NEraWinter2020 Prompt for Dec 21: Ice
Relationships: Markus/North (Detroit: Become Human)
Comments: 11
Kudos: 12
Collections: New ERA Discord: Festival of Prompts





	Baby, It's Cold Outside (We're Androids, Who Cares)

No one could deny that North was a little on the icy side. That held true for her personality, certainly. Not that Markus had ever minded that. Like Carl, it meant she was honest with him, and honestly he enjoyed the challenge, and the thrill when he caught her in one of her rare softer moments. But it could also be said of her physically. Interfacing with her was like interfacing with a glacier. She could literally freeze a rundown android in their tracks if she wasn’t careful. Some androids just came with extra coolant or really powerful fans and North came with both.

Markus on the other hand had lived with an old man for most of his life, existing in an eternal oasis of 75 degrees Fahrenheit, and after Carl complained about his cold hands while administering morning medication, a few changes to his programming had turned him into a walking heater to boot. Markus never minded that either.

However, this fundamental heat differential between them was why Markus planned this entire romantic getaway with North in the middle of a bitter Detroit winter. Markus had read a lot of romances (possibly too many romances?) and yes, reading had put some ideas into his head and now he couldn’t stop thinking about thawing North out like they were in Hans Christian Anderson’s _Snow Queen_. It sounded so nice that Markus wanted to describe the whole plan to North in the most loving language his literature database possessed. But North was never the cuddling type. She never fell asleep with him, hardly even snuggled up to him on the sofa. Given how he found Jericho, huddling in the dark and the cold…well, maybe he was the only android ever made that even liked being warm.

But—maybe he just hadn’t found the right moment to share his internal heating system yet. He marshaled his literary knowledge and picked the most romantic bed and breakfast he could find, at the base of a popular ski resort just outside of Detroit.

His plans were complicated when North insisted on two rooms when he booked the place.

“We could share a bed,” he offered.

“You’re too fancy to share a room!” North laughed, and that was that. 

The romance stories were clear on what he needed to do. So he waited until North was gone and just… canceled on of them.

Now they stood at the lobby desk, North frowning next to him while Markus tried not to drum his fingers too anxiously on the counter.

“I’m sorry, it looks like we missed one of your rooms,” the attendant said, looking anxious. North bristled.

“Huh? Well—do you have another opening?”

The attendant checked the computer. “Well, it’s the height of the season…”

Markus drummed his fingers a little faster. _Please let there only be one room, please let there only be one room, please let there be only one room…_

“Yes, I’m afraid there’s only the one room available.”

North put both hands down on the counter. “Couldn’t you switch us out with someone else? Something with two beds?” She looked to Markus for backup. He tried his most innocent shrug, thirium pump thundering. This was more stressful than Stratford Tower.

_Please let there only be one bed, please let there only be one bed…_

“Fortunately,” the attendant said, “We can put you in our new hostel wing!”

Markus’s fingers stopped drumming. “Excuse me?”

“Yes—we’ll let you have the whole wing at half-price,” he said, grinning. “As an apology for the confusion. Let me show you.”

…And that was how Markus found himself staring at a barn-sized room with literally fifty bunk beds in row after row.

“We’ve had a lot of success with booking skiiers for the weekends,” the attendant said. “Plenty of beds for you!”

Markus gulped. Yes, lots of beds. Too many beds. “Well, it isn’t exactly what we were thinking…”

“Right,” North said, already halfway across the barn as she explored it. “This is way better! We’ll take it!”

Markus picked at the cuff of his jacket. “But—North, don’t you want something a little more…uh…palatial?”

“No clue what that means,” North said, “But you can have the room we booked, if it means that much to you.”

Markus felt his ears turning hot. “Well—I’m sure if they’re booked solid they’ll want to free up something…”

“Oh, thank you,” the attendant said, “Don’t worry, we won’t book anyone else in here, so you’ll have the whole space to yourselves tonight. Three bathrooms and a kitchen too! And at that price it can’t be beat!”

The attendant left him with extra towels and soaps. North disappeared into the bowels of the barn.

“North?” Markus took a few steps inside. The room was huge and therefore freezing—it couldn’t be more than fifty degrees.

“Hey, watch this!” Markus looked up to see North jump from bunk to bunk all the way across the barn toward him.

Markus winced. “We don’t want them to have to remake every bed in the place.”

“They said we had the room to ourselves!” She hopped down in front of him. “All this space! We can really spread out!”

Markus did not want to spread out. He in fact wanted to do the opposite of spread out. He frantically searched his database of literature for tips on how to proceed while North pirouetted around the room less like a snowflake and more like an ice shard in a hailstorm. 

“Now I know how you must have felt in the mansion!” she said. “This is great!”

“I guess,” Markus laughed. North’s intensity was hard to resist.

“Let’s go for a walk,” she decided. She ran at him, grabbed his hand and started to drag him toward the door.

“Wait,” Markus tried to politely dig in his heels. “Don’t you want to stay in?”

She laughed. “It’s not like we need to sleep or anything!”

“But I could make us a fire here. It’d be nice.”

“I mean, unless you got a jug of gasoline that seems pretty lame.”

“But,” Markus gulped, then unzipped the collar of his jacket, trying to look as handsome as possible. “Baby, it’s cold outside.”

“It’s cold _inside_ ,” North said. “We’re androids, I didn’t think we needed to turn up the heat.” She poked him. “And if you’re cold I don’t see why you’re getting undressed.”

“Uh—” Markus felt himself blushing, intensified by his heat units running hotter than they had in years. North frowned and pressed her hand to his forehead.

“You’re burning up, actually. That’s weird. You must really be cold.”

“I’m fine.” To prove it, he unzipped his jacket a little further. North’s eyes tracked the motion for a second before she shook her head.

“Well, you better lie down for a second—you might be overheating.” She led him to the nearest bunk and pushed him down onto it, then started to interface. “I’ll run a diagnostic.”

Markus, sure a connection between them would give away his intentions, pulled away his arm. “Uh, I’m fine. Just—Why don’t you join me?”

“I’m _trying_ to join you.” She wiggled her fingers and reached for his arm again. He barely dodged.

“I mean here. On the bed. With me. You can be—uh—with me, right here…?” He spread out attractively.

“…Are you glitching?”

“Uh.” Markus blinked. “Yes. Definitely. Mmhmm. 100%. You can’t leave me alone, right? What if I malfunction?...”

North considered this, and in an instant she was dropping down on top of his chest. Markus started to grin in triumph until she planted her elbows on either side of his head and glared down at him. “Alright, what’s going on?”

“Uh, nothing!” He carefully put an arm around her. North’s jacket was cool to the touch but his hands quickly warmed it. “This is great. I’m feeling better already.”

“Then why are you as hot as a car engine?” The warmth and the analogy seemed to appeal to North though, and she settled herself more fully on top of him like a snake on a warm rock. “Come on, spill.”

“It’s really nothing, North—”

“Oh, is it? I guess I can just go sleep in one of the other bunks then.”

“No, wait!” Markus grabbed the hem of her jacket but she just cocked her head at him. He sighed and dropped his head back. “I was _hoping_ we could just… you know, huddle for warmth for a while, if you wanted? All the great romances do it and—” he held up a finger. “If you laugh we’re gonna have to have words.”

North’s eyes were bright with amusement. “Is that all?”

He shrugged. “You just never want to cuddle…I mean, am I _too_ hot?”

“I mean, yeah, you’re too hot…” North’s laugh trailed off into a nervous huff. “But I’m a block of ice! No one wants that. I accidentally shut down Lucy just by giving her a hug, once.” She shrugged and now she looked nervous too. “I figured you run so warm you’d hate that.”

Markus felt his thirium pump melt a little. “Not at all. I bet I could probably make enough heat for the both of us. If you'd like to. Unless you’d find that uncomfortable.”

“N-no!” North gave a sort of high-pitched laugh. “I mean, yes—that sounds amazing—I like that you’re hot—I mean _hot_ hot—"

Markus smirked. “Hey, who’s glitching now?”

“Shut up!” She grabbed the pillow and smacked him with it, then dove down on the bed to tuck her cold body up against his. “I warn you, I am literally a heat sink, I will drink up all your warmth in about ten minutes.”

“I’d like to see you try,” Markus said.

“Oh yeah,” North snuggled deeper against his chest. “That’s the stuff. We can go run around outside tomorrow.” She poked him again. “If you tell anyone about this, no one will ever find your body.”

“Noted,” Markus said, pulling the blanket over them. “They won’t find me until the spring thaw.”

“Mmm.” North smushed her face against his neck and sighed, and maybe there was just a little heat there in her breath.

By morning, icy North had entirely melted into a warm puddle in Markus’s arms. 

**Author's Note:**

> I was inspired by that reverse fanfic trope thing going around, "too many beds"
> 
> Thank you for reading! Comments appreciated! :)


End file.
